I had no idea it has been 7 months since I last blogged!

Life is crazy! So many ups and downs! So many joys and sorrows! An through it all, so many places for growth. Growth in the Lord! Which makes EVERYTHING worth it. God never told us or promised us that this life was going to be easy. He has promised us in Heb. 13:5 " Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you"!!!! As most know, the last couple of months has been a roller coaster ride for me. However, I have watched the Lord transform me in ways I had no idea he could do.

God showed me an important aspect to me and who I was. All of my life I have known that I had a very strong personality. I was not raised in ministry. Therefore I didn't always say the "right" things, in the right way. So, Scott became my security in a social setting. Those of you that knew Scott, knew he had amazing people skills. I began to lean on him to filter my words. He became my "safety net". Having him around gave me a security in knowing he would help me to do and say the "right" things. I leaned on Scott more than I leaned on God. After Scott died, I lost who Cori was. My security was gone! God showed me what I was doing and had done. After the accident I only wanted the people closest to me, to be around me. I didn't want anyone around me that would take "work", as far as a relationship was concerned. Not to be mean, and not that I didn't like them. It was because I didn't feel safe. I was scared. Then some things happened along the way of life.... Instead of pushing through the safety of friendships and fighting for the ones that I loved.... It was easier to run. I was scared to death to say or do the "wrong" thing. I had no one to filter my thoughts through. Again, my "safety" was gone. He was no longer there to help me get through one of the toughest times in my life. I left everyone and everything behind that became unsafe to me. Please understand that I had no idea I was doing this. I still believe with all of my heart, that God was leading me. However, I pushed all that I had, away. All out of fear of loosing again. It is one of those things, that you create the very things you are afraid of. In a social setting, I would blossom again as long as I had someone that I found safe with me. I was clingy to the select couple of people. I didn't see any of this until God showed me recently.

I was told over and over that I had walls up and wouldn't let anyone in. I was a very strong person. I never saw that "strong" person in me. I saw a very weak women that had 5 kids and no husband. A women just surviving! Then God showed me the "tower" I had become. I was afraid of people around me and I was trying to "get through" life. Because of the fear I had, (the safety issues) people took it like I was to good or that I didn't need them. That is not true. I was a weak, scared girl with 5 kids trying to get through life, the best way I knew how.

I believe that God is showing me and helping me to lean on him for my safety. To trust in him! I am very thankful, for a God that is loving, compassionate, merciful and gracious! His ultimate goal for our lives is "Kingdom" bound!!!! That means that life is not going to be easy! But the end result is going to be so rewarding. I can't wait to hear... "Well done my good and faithful servant"!!!! Matt. 25:21

A Really Funny Jett Story....

So last night all of my kids were at my moms house. I showed up to a neighborhood full of kids in their front yard. The kids were trying to be really nice for my mom, and plant some veggies for next year. Sweet ugh? Well, they decided that they were going to go next door to the neighbors garden. They all began to pick his left over habanero peppers. EEEEE hahhahahaha Connor and Caiden had no clue what they were messing with. They played with the peppers for a short time only to find out that they were really hot. ahhahaha About 15 mins after I got home, Caiden came running inside crying. No... Realllllly Crrryying ahhahaha He had picked his nose. hahahhaha Well the habanero pepper oil was all over his hands and now inside his nose. I should have been more compassionate towards him, but I just couldn't help but laugh. So we got a wash cloth full of water. Caiden then begins to suck the water through his nose to try to get the burn to go away. All to find out, it didn't work. So.... Mom to the rescue. I say hey lets fill the sink with water. Then we will stick his head in the water. Trying to figure out how we were going to get the burn to go away. We did just that. All the while he is still crying and I am holding back my laughter. I pick him up and he is doing a hand stand into the kitchen sink. His feet are to the ceiling and he begins to put his head into the water. I then LOSE IT!!!! Laughing so hard that I think my mom and I are going to die. The louder we laughed the madder he got. ahhahhahahhaha mean I know. I couldn't help it. Caiden was blowing into the water, to then suck the water back in. It could have made us a million dollars on Americas Funniest Home Videos. But, I didn't have a camera. So now you get the mental picture to laugh with me. hahahhaha Then about 10 mins later, Connor comes in yelling about his nose and eyes burning. Yep you got it, he had done the same thing. I am telling you, the Jetts can't keep there figures out of their noses. ahhahahha This will be a story they will tell for the rest of their lives. Only in the life of the Jett household. :) I love it!!!!

It hit me right where I was at.....

I am going through a lot right now. So much so, it is kind of overwhelming. I am just coming off of the 2 year anniversary with the death of Scott and many other crazy life things going on. I opened my bible tonight to a passage of scripture that I have read and known for many years. 1 Cor. 13..... The Looooove Chapter. hahhaha It was just what I needed to hear. It starts out with describing what love is and isn't. Love never gives up, cares more for others than for self, doesn't want what it doesn't have, doesn't strut, have a swelled head, force itself on others. Isn't always me first. Doesn't fly off the handle, keep score, revel when others grovel. It doesn't take pleasure in the flowering of truth. It puts up with anything. TRUSTS GOD ALWAYS. Always looks for the best, doesn't look back, KEEPS GOING TO THE END! Now that is a mouth full of stepping on my toes.

Then it goes on to say Love NEVER dies. Good stuff!!!!

Now to the part that hit me. I have been really struggling with knowing the details of where and why, I am, where I am. I want to know the future and see hope somewhere. In verse 9 of the Message it says "understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always in complete. BUT, when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be cancelled."

Meaning we can't see the situation at hand in its entirety. We have to trust God. We have to know and believe that He will complete what we can't see. We need Him to complete our situations in life. That is what faith and trusting Him is all about.

It goes on to say in verse 12 "We don't see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. (My favorite... I am clamming this) BUT IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE THE WEATHER CLEARS AND THE SUN SHINES BRIGHT!!!!! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!"

O dear Jesus, would you please allow this storm to pass. And the blessings of your clear blue sky and bright, eye squinching sun to shine down on my life. I long for you to get this storm out of the way and the blessings to fall around me, in ways I could have never imagined.

The last section of this chapter says this... "But for right now, until that completeness, we have 3 things to do to lead us toward that consummation:

1. TRUST steadily in God

2. HOPE unswervingly

3. LOVE extravagantly

All of which do not come easily. They are easy to say and a lot harder to do. I have to trust that God loves me enough to lead, guide and direct my every move. Because I am putting Him first in my life. I have to hope that I am not really missing the mark on the decisions that I am making. And go back to trusting in THE God that is leading me. Then I have to love God first and foremost. So that I am able to love those around me and the "one" that God has for me in the future. Love doesn't take hurt away. But it does give me hope for the future.

Where are we, 2 years later?

WOW! I can't believe that it has been 2 years since I lost the man of my dreams. It has been a true roller coaster ride. So many good times and so many bad times. I have realized that the first year was survival. I thought the first year was going to be the hardest. Man was I wrong. The second year was reality. Reality is a lot harder to except than survival. So many emotions and hardships that have to be overcome. The reality of doing things on your own. Or even the simple tasks at home that need to be done. I have had an amazing support system along the way. My parents are incredible. I couldn't do what I do, as a mom and keep up, without them. Yet, getting the all of the kids homework done, dinner on the table, kids sports practices, then bathed and in bed, all to realize you are on your own. Better yet... disciplining 5 kids, that is hard. Before I got to be the easy one. Now, I have to be the hard one. I have to be the one to say NO! Ugh! That is hard for a momma that wants to give her kids all that they want and think they need. But, with the Lords help, I have made it so far. I have watched my kids overcome and survive an incredible dent in their life. They are full of energy and laughter, just like any other kid their age. They push my buttons and sometimes get away with it. Others not so much. I have had to figure out when they are using their hardship for their advantage and when they are truly hurting. Sometimes it is tricky. :) However, I am calling their bluff just as much as they are calling mine. haha

Connor is 11 and in 5th grade. This is the first year that he has started school with a smile on his face for the first time in 2 years. He is the Elementary School Treasurer for Stuco. He is one of the most thoughtful kids I have ever seen. He is always making sure that everyone in the family is taken care of. I have to constantly put him in his place, he is not the dad. He is the oldest brother. I do my best to make sure that he still gets to be a kid. He is in the middle of playing soccer. He chose to have the number 33 for his number. The age of Scott when he died. We talk about him as much as the kids are willing.

Caiden is 9 and in 4th grade. He is the Class Rep for stuco. He is a true leader. He loves to hunt and fish. The boy is so much like Scott it is scary. Anything he touches it turns to gold. He has a gift. I pray that he will use his talent in sports for the Lord. He is very sensitive to the Lord. I love it. He also, is playing soccer. He chose to have 4 as his number. The number 4 is Scott's favorite number. Caiden does his best to keep Scott's memory alive.

Grace is a girly girl. Yet, she can fight with the best of boys. She is 6 and in first grade. She is in gymnastics and playing soccer as well. That girl keeps my on my toes. I pray for her because she is just like her momma. Please pray for her too. hahha She knows what she wants and she goes for it.

Coltin, O my where do I start? He is Scott Jett on steroids. That boy is so full of personality and energy it kills me. He keeps me spinning, and I still can't keep up. Everyone laughs at him. He is extremely loud and very vocal. He is now 3 and in preschool. That poor teacher has her hands full. hahaha

Christian is now 1 1/2. The same age as Coltin was when Scott died. He is starting to really show his personality. He is very strong willed and has a temper. He will fight for whatever he wants. He is gaining his independence. He likes to do it for himself. I can't believe he is a toddler now and the baby days are over. I am excited to see his personality come together as he starts to talk.

Me....????? I am not sure where to start. I have come to a place that I am okay with Scott being gone. I don't like it. However, I am excepting the fact, he is where I long to be one day.... Heaven. I miss him like crazy. I miss the fun crazy times and long talks that we would have. But, I would much rather, be where he is right now. I am glad the survival and reality stages are over. I am hoping and praying that the third year, is one of finding my craziness and happiness again. I look forward to being a little wild and adventurous again. (Within the Christian standards of course ahhaha) I have decided that it is time for me. For the last 2 years it has been about my kids. I have for the most part, set them as priority. My needs coming last. Now it is time for Cori. I want to do what feels good for me. Things I like to do. I don't know what that looks like. Maybe date :) That sounds like fun. Yes, I have been on a couple of dates. Don't think about asking :) Cuz this girl isn't going to talk. hahahha I know the Lord told me, the man of my dreams at 32, is going to look much different, than the man of my dreams at 19. And that, I am okay with. I am praying and believing that God is going to lead, guide and direct me in all I do.

Thank you so much for all of your prayers. They are working. I feel the strength of the Lord in my life. He is and has been speaking to me. I long to please and live for Him. He is my ultimate priority in life. I want to see Him glorified. He is an amazing God, that loves me and you like crazy. I may not understand Why? or How come? But, I do find comfort in knowing He is in control of my life. No matter what happens He is going to take care of me. All I have to do is trust Him and His ways. Through everything I have been through the last 2 years, I know I am a very blessed girl!!!!

I am in the palm of the Lord's hand!

Recently I have had some new adventures come up in my life. Decisions and choices that will be made. I fear making the wrong move in my life. I not only have my life to worry about messing up, I have 5 amazing lives depending on my every move. I do not want to do anything that would jeopardize my children's lives or walk with the Lord. Let alone create a mess for me. I am and have been seeking the Lord with all that I have. I am praying that he lead, guide and direct me in all I say and do. I really have been fretting over making wrong choices and decisions in life. So last night I asked the Lord to give me something to stand on. This may sound odd, but.... When I ask the Lord to do that, I just open the bible to wear it lands. I know some would say that is crazy. However, most of the time it helps me right where I am. This particular night I opened to Psalms 139.

Thank you Lord!!!!

Verse 1-5 "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in- behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me."

That brought total comfort to me. God knows my every move. He knows all of my thoughts and fears. He even knows what I am going to say and do before I do.

Verse 9-10 "If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast."

No matter what, as long as I continue to seek him.... He WILL guide my every move! All of my days have been ordained by God.

Verse 16 "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

Verse 17 is my heart!!!! "How precious to me are you thoughts, O God!"

Verse 23-24 are right where I am at... "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and LEAD ME in the way everlasting!!!!!!!!!"

I/we have to remember that if we are putting God first, he is going to lead us. Matt. 6:33 "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you." Seek God first and then He will take care of everything else. Matt 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

So I AM DONE WORRYING ABOUT MY EVERY MOVE!!! God is with me and He is going to lead and guide me in all of my ways.

The second half is going to be even better

Tonight, for the first time in almost 2 years, I am feeling up beat. I have felt like the life God gave me was kind of a cursed one. I lost the love of my life and now raising 5 kids on my own (with parental help). WOW! That is all that I can say. My brother in law got cancer. My brother got cancer. I still am not sure how much more I can take. But, I have now got some glimpse of hope. I have had it the whole time just afraid of claiming it. I have had to come to some really hard realizations in life and with God. I have had to examine where I am and what I believe. Some, I like and most I don't. But they are truths to who and what God is in my life. I am going to stick with God NO MATTER WHAT!!!! HE is the love of my life!!! Without God I really have nothing. He completes it all! He is my Rock and my Redeemer!!!! Okay, so back to the why I am talking about all of this......

Since the day that Scott died, I have felt like Job (in the bible) and was very discouraged. Job lead a difficult life. One that was full of suffering. A life I was and am afraid to be like. I didn't want any more suffering. I felt like if I admitted that I felt like Job, God might bring on more suffering. I am scared to death of more suffering. BUT, then today I read Job 42. The very last chapter. WOW! I feel more encouraged today than I felt in almost 2 years. God blessed Job. I know I have known and been taught that. But, in the midst of my trials I obviously put that in the back of my brain. The bible says in chapter 42:12 "The Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first." I felt like God showed me that he is going to bless me beyond my wildest dreams. Then it says what all Job had been given..... 42:12-13 "He had 4000 sheep, 6000 camels, and a 1000 yoke of oxen and a 1000 donkeys. And he also had 7 sons and 3 daughters." Not only did God bless Job emotionally, he blessed him in his family as well as financially. God blessed and rewarded him in ways that he couldn't dream!!!! All because of his undenying love and faithfulness to the Lord in the midst of suffering! I can only hope and pray that I can uphold the same undenying love and faithfulness to the most amazing God!

O, Lord please as I claim this chapter on my life. Let me see your hand and will for my life unfold in ways I never thought possible. I love you Lord with all of my heart!!! You are my everything. Thank you in advance for you blessings and love! AMEN!!!

What are we focused on?

Tonight I was talking to a friend. He politely said that he thought I was a negative person. That STUNG! I had to do some soul searching. I really had to see if I was reacting in a negative light. I don't think I am a negative person. I do think I am a realist. hahhaha With that said.....

I have been looking at my circumstances in life. I have focused on all that is going on around me that I have lost sight of my purpose. Even while typing this, I am still a work in progress. I still see the situation at hand no matter how I look at it. I still do not have a husband or a father for my children. I have many other obstacles that I am dealing with on a daily basis. There is no way around those. However, my main focus, should out way my daily situations that I am going through. My hope does not come from what I see. By keeping my eyes on what I am going through is only making me feel defeated and deserted. I feel overwhelmed and hopeless. No where to turn and no one to go to. Those are all feelings! Scott would always say... "You can't help how you feel. But, you can help how you act." Those are great words of wisdom.

2 Cor. 4:18 "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen. For what is seen is TEMPORARY, but what is unseen is ETERNAL!"

I have got to turn my eyes back to the Lord and his purposes in my life. I have to look to him.

Matt. 7:33 "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you."

When I look to him first, he will take care of my every need. I have nothing to worry about.

Matt. 7:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life."

2 Cor. 5:7 "We live by FAITH, not by SIGHT."

Heb. 11:1 "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and CERTAIN of what we do not see."

Are you certain in what you do not see? Are you confident in the God? Do you know he is who he says he is?

Without a doubt.... I believe he is an amazing God. A caring, loving, compassionate, jealous God!!!

Heb. 10:23 "Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful!"

Heb. 10:35 "Do not throw away your CONFIDENCE, it will richly be rewarded."

Our confidence is believing God is who he says he is, and he will do what he says he will do.

Heb. 10:36 "You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."

Ps. 25:15 "My eyes are ever on the Lord for only he will release my feet from the snare!!!!"

All of that to say....

When we take our eyes off of the things of the Lord, we lose sight of what our purpose is. Just like I told my kids the night of the accident..... As soon as we have told ALL of the people we are suppose to tell about God, we get to go home. We have a mission... It is about the kingdom of God and his will being done here on earth. It is not about our circumstances that we are in.